How to Deal With an Aggressive Partner


Nearly 33 percent of women and 25 percent of men in the United States have experienced, physical violence, rape, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime. In addition, around 74 percent of all murder-suicides involved an intimate partner including ex-spouse, spouse, common-law spouse, or boyfriend/girlfriend). Of these, 96 percent were women killed by their intimate partners.

Verbal and physical abuse from an aggressive partner is a common problem among married and cohabitating couples in the United States. Partner aggression that comprises both physical (e.g., grabbing, shoving) and verbal (e.g., insulting) behaviors have been associated with a number of physical (chronic pain and sexually transmitted infections among others), and mental health problems (such as anxiety, and depressive symptoms, substance abuse, and dependence). Therefore, it is important to deal with partner aggression before it leaves permanent scars.

Here are some suggestions that can help people experiencing partner aggression in an effective manner:

Handle the Situation Calmly

It is always difficult to keep calm when someone is yelling at you for nothing but then a similar reaction from your end tends to make the situation worse. It is rather a wise move to keep your calm and not fight back. In most cases, an aggressive partner’s anger subsides if the other partner remains calm. And this is the time when you can discuss the matter and may look for a solution, which may also include seeking counseling for anger management.

Avoid Conflict

You may feel like breaking nose of your partner when he or she has an aggressive temperament. But, it’s always a better option to disengage and avoid any conflict. Your angry partner might look for an excuse or reason to shower his or her aggression but it is a wise strategy to refrain and trying to neutralize the heightened emotions.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention ( CDC ), the occurrence of intimate partner violence can be managed by promoting respectful, healthy, and nonviolent relationships and communities can help reduce the occurrence of IPV. It also can prevent the harmful and long-lasting effects of intimate partner aggression on individuals, families, and communities.

Look for the Cause of Aggression

While staying calm and disengagement may act as a temporary fix, it is important to find a permanent solution. The anger or aggression may be an outcome of an underlying medical or emotional problem. First try to create a compassionate environment between you and your partner in order to encourage compassion, understanding, and good listening. Talk to your partner when he or she is calm and pacified. And try to work out a solution rather than criticizing or blaming him or her for the behavior.

Create an amicable atmosphere and then communicate how you feel about it, where your limit is, and what your values are. And at the same time let them do that as well. It will not only cultivate a respectful environment but will also be helpful in finding the root cause of anger

Seek Help

After you take your partner into confidence, you can convince him or her to seek medical help. It is possible that the partner has anger management problems or is stressed for some reason.

Cognitive-behavioral treatments, according to research studies, have been found to be the most commonly recommended treatment alternatives for both anger and aggression.

“Anger treatments have consistently demonstrated at least moderate effectiveness among both non-clinical and psychiatric populations”, a study suggests.

If you or a loved one is battling anger management issues, get in touch with Medical Concierge Recovery. Call our 24/7 helpline at 877-636-0042 and discuss the problem with our admission counselors for information on mental health treatment centers. You can also chat online with our representatives for more information about residential treatment centers offering the best inpatient mental health facilities.

Susan Navarez is associated with Medical Concierge Recovery for many years. The company provides Mental Health and Behavioral Health treatment facilities in the USA.

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